Count to Nine

Don’t close your eyes – you’ll never wake up,

Don’t drop your head, don’t let your knees bend

Under the weight of what has been done

To you, nor of the guilt for the harm you did;


Wait! Do not fall asleep on me now!

There may be something out there that will

Yet touch your heart – perhaps, another wild dream

For which you’ll need your strength, love and grit;


Do not let go, although you’re so are tired!

Chase out the ghost of death from your eyes!

I dare you to survive in spite of all,

I know you’re all but gone… Turn around!


Fight for yourself, like I know you can!

No, not because you want to but just

Because it is your nature – you must,

Until you’re swallowed by the hungry ground


I will not judge when you learn to walk

Again; I will not look when you have to cry,

You know you have been given nine lives:

Nine agonizing births, and nine deaths,


So count to nine, and rise one more time

4 thoughts on “Count to Nine

    1. I think, climbing has, perhaps, made me a little more accustomed to failure and more appreciative of the lessons it teaches than I’d been before. It also taught me to pretend that I am stronger than I really am.
      Thank you for reading!

  1. Because it is your nature – sometimes we have to be proactive and activate our survival genes even if all seems lost “rage against the dying of the light…”(Thomas) or just crawl up and die and don’t complain.

    1. The sense of utter helplessness against the negative thoughts and inner and outer forces sometimes makes it very hard to do anything but curl up and die. On some days, existence just seems like an endless fight, where you are loosing every round. Yet, the time is still running, so better keep fighting, I suppose.

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