Beyond Repair

A hole does not grow bigger

Than the heart

Which is its home;

/

A knife does not cut deeper

Than the flesh

Which clings to bones;

/

Time cannot steal the beauty

Of a face,

Whose light won’t age;

/

And fire cannot burn

The story

If burns the page;

/

Thus, I will not be broken,

While I breathe,

Beyond repair

/

And with my hands and thoughts

I’ll reach for hope

Beyond despair

The Brushstrokes

It’s all a dream:

The lowest moments

And the greatest,

The imperfections

And the changes

Made by the mind

To what was by the mind,

Confused,

Created;

/

It doesn’t hurt, really,

When in my nightmares

Hungry demons

Gnaw at my bones

And rip to pieces

The magic heart

That every morning

I find unfailingly

Beating in my chest;

/

It is all a mirage:

This face, this body,

Their existence

And their ultimate

Disintegration;

There’s nothing wrong

With pieces breaking,

Cracks manifesting

On the unforgiving skin

/

Painted over

Emptiness

In thick colors

Of fear

Named and signed

By the artist,

‘Me’ –

Both as a sentence

And a key

/

To freedom

The Habit

I have to ask you

Not to ask me

If it hurts –

/

Pain has become

Less of a feeling

And more of mere word;

/

It walks me home,

It sleeps with me

And holds my hand

/

Keeping at bay

The creeping fear

That I have nothing left;

/

You say I seem

To love my pain;

I wish that this was true;

/

What’s true’s that all I ever wanted

Hurt, challenged,

Broke or bruised me;

/

You see, I wasn’t

Made to live

The dreams of greater men,

/

And this was why

I had to make

A habit out of pain

 

The Ghost

Rise as if nothing had changed,
As if you still had all your powers;
Smile with the courage and grace,
Which once made you worthy of love;
/
Walk, as if you knew the way,
Thanking the loved ones you’re leaving forever:
They needn’t know that you will not emerge
From the storm, which will swallow you whole;
/
Now, not tomorrow, not a moment later;
Now! Brace yourself, take a breath, then, the step
Into the whirlwind of all you’ve been dreading:
There’s nowhere to hide and nowhere else to go;
/
Look in the eyes of demons from your nightmares,
Feel their claws brush against your bare nerves;
Watch them dig out your heart and cut into pieces
The treasures you lived for, honored and adored;
/
Scream if you must, here nobody could hear you –
Hell is as private a place as they come,
But writhing in pain, please, remember, remember
The faces of those, who loved you, whom you loved;
/
And then, rise as if nothing had changed –
It’s behind you, the eye of the storm;
You cannot go back; you stand alone
You have said your good-byes, ghost